Roots and Wings

It was late afternoon and Barry had gone to watch his daughter Alyssa play baseball, Jana had gone to a Chapter meeting to find funding for her annual Bluff Kids' Kamp and Kira and Grange were spending time with their Aunt Kathy and Uncle Craig. So I was alone in the trading post when I noticed Ruby Coggeshell's pickup crunching through the gravel parking lot of the trading post. If she has one of her expensive rugs, Ruby calls before she comes by, so I was pretty sure she didn't have anything that would break our already strained bank.

Ruby and her mother, Bessie, weave a beautiful style of rug known as the Red Mesa Outline. The pattern is very dynamic, and reminds me of a segment of the Disney movie Fantasia, where music is represented by pulsating lines. The Navajo people believe the pattern refers to "female energy," the only monster the Hero Twins, Monster Slayer and Born for Water, were unable to conquer. Barry and I relate to that particular style of weaving, because we have never been able to manage, let alone conquer, the female energy around here.

Ruby, Bessie and Bessie's sister, Mae Yazzie, are some of our favorite rug weavers. Aside from weaving beautiful rugs, they are easy to talk with and always nicely turned out. Their clothing is universally immaculate, and we often have nice conversations about what's happening with their family. On this particular day, our discussion turned to Ruby's only child, Kevin, who recently graduated high school.

Ruby mentioned that her son was soon entering the Navy, and I found myself wondering when the military amended its policies to allow children into its ranks. In our photograph album, there is a picture dated 1996, which shows Kevin as a ten year old boy holding a rug we had just purchased from Bessie. To me it seems that Kevin should still be ten.

As we talked, Ruby said , "I believe there are two things you need to give your children, roots and wings; Kevin already has roots, now he is getting his wings." I had never heard that particular phrase before, and it struck me as terribly appropriate. As a single mother, Ruby has done an excellent job raising Kevin to know who he is and where he came from. Now, difficult though it may be, she was ready to release him into the world.

My conversations with Ruby made me think of my children, and all the nieces and nephews who have grown up around the trading post. A few of those nieces and nephews are beginning the emancipation process, and their excitement and nervousness is sometimes palpable. Soon they will be out of the house and off to college. One of the most interesting aspects of this process is how my siblings and in-laws are reacting; they often seem more nervous about the separation than their children. They fret and stew about being empty nesters, worry about not doing enough with the children before they leave home and wonder what to do when the kids are gone.

It may be a while before Dacia, Kira and Grange fully unfurl their wings, but already they are threatening. Raising the children at the trading post has given them a certain maturity and comfort with other people that most children don't develop until much later. It has also given them a sense of business practice and personal relationships. Lately Barry and I have been amazed as Kira creates joke after joke, bringing them to us in return for her three dollar payment. She seems so self-assured and confident as she puts the jokes on the counter, watches as we read them, monitors our response and demands payment. The trading post seems to have grounded Kira and given her the opportunity to begin developing her wings at the same time. It will be interesting to see how she soars.

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