Can you hear me now?

I have to say that the marketing group for Verizon Wireless has picked up on a catch phrase we can relate to at the trading post. "Can you hear me now?" is often spoken here. We find ourselves using their slogan when we receive a telephone call on our ultra sophisticated phone system and hear someone on a cell phone at the other end. Under those circumstances, dead air, static and unfinished messages are common. I am certain Verizon's be-speckled spokesman has never spent a mobile minute in this spacious canyon country. (Say that three times fast!).

When cell phones, these fanciful creations of modern technology, found their way into our consciousness, we thought we had discovered the ultimate solution to our communication problems. Full and open conversation was within our grasp; a quantum leap in message transmission was now available.

It has always been a problem transmitting messages to the Navajo artists living on the Reservation. Residing among these monolithic monuments is great for the soul, but telephone lines simply do not penetrate the vast reaches of the Navajo Nation. In the past, snail mail and messengers "heading in that direction" were the best we could expect. Although these were an enormous improvement over smoke signals, they were still mostly ineffective.

We all bought into the cell phone craze in the beginning, some of us even invested in the market. We figured that AT&T wireless stock would be a sure thing. We should have gone to the track and bet on the ponies; the odds would have been better. My wife has never forgiven me for that investing faux-pas, and still holds me personally responsible for decreasing the kids' saving accounts and squandering their college funds. My claim of "manifest privilege" has only tightened the noose around my red neck and face .

The thought of being able to get in touch with our out of touch business partners was too titillating to overlook. At the touch of a button, and at the speed of sound, we would have the opportunity to express ourselves openly, fully and completely. Our ideas would be delivered as fresh and pure as the original epiphany Our business would improve greatly, due to the immediate transmission of ideas.

What we did not anticipate is that cell phone signals do not dip into canyons and curve around rock walls to carry our messages. The linear signals and ins and outs of our baroque landscape make for troublesome connections.

Being situated in a rock bowl makes dialing out of the trading post on a cell phone an impossibility. For some reason sandstone does not conduct the signals very well. We are able to receive calls routed through our land line provider, but the reception quality varies greatly. Short of placing a tower on top of the Twin Rocks, we are not likely to improve our situation. Therein lies the problem. Unless we agree to having transmission towers built in and around our natural wonders, cell phones are only going to be useful in limited circumstances.

Wireless phone service is spotty at best on the Reservation. When traveling, my suggestion is to pull over quickly and stop the car when you find a signal. You must however beware of traffic following too closely though. Highway patrolmen take a less than lenient view of rear end collisions caused by "signal stops". Anticipate phone service by watching for a line of local vehicles along the road, and pull in behind them. Chances are this is the location of a narrow band of signal coverage. If you have trouble connecting, wait until the car in front of you pulls forward; you will eventually get your turn "in the spotlight".

The cell phone has dialed itself into the lives of everybody, including the Native people of the Desert Southwest. It has become a necessity, if only because there is no better solution to the communication problems of this vast land of mesas and monuments. We now see our Native American brothers and sisters with cell phones pressed to their ears on a regular basis; often shouting Verizon's now famous slogan with great frustration.

What I am now wondering is "what about satellite phones"? Now there is the answer! Signals from straight overhead, no worries concerning obstacles or distance. I wonder if there is any money left in those accounts. "I can hear it now"..

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